It’s 11:15 p.m. and I just finished skewering about 10 pounds of meat for our camping trip.
Knowing my husband, he’ll have stuffed everything in the van by 5 a.m. tomorrow and expect us to strap ourselves in by 5:15 a.m. Bless him.
That’s what my father always says when he doesn’t want to speak ill of someone. My friend Helen would say, “Bless his cotton socks.”
I really want to say, “Feck you and the granola train you rode in on.”
It’s our annual camping trip to Samuel de Champlain Provincial Park in Mattawa (about three hours west of Ottawa).
I hate camping. I faked liking camping when we were dating. What can I say? You reap what you sow. It’s 10 times worse camping with children. At least now, my children sleep through the night.
Earlier camping trips featured Little One playing with flashlights until 3 a.m. It was like sleeping through an eye exam. Take the flashlights away? See how well you can sleep through shrieking night terrors about crocodiles. I dare you. In a tent.
Then there was the trip when Older One ate too much and then barfed all night long. Did I mention we were in a tent that had a broken zipper and about a zillion mosquitoes bunking in with us? A laugh a minute.
When I return hollow-eyed and bug bitten from my annual trip, my friends always want to know how it was.
“Rainy but buggy,” I always say. Also cold. Rarely do we take off our tuques because invariably the weather sucks for this trip.
“There are worse things” , I typed on my Facebook status update today, “Like being bitten by a rabid coyote.”
My friend Sheyna immediately countered with another example of what would be worse: “Having one of your eyeballs hang out of its socket, dangling and swinging by the thing that attaches it to your head.”
She’s so right.
What can I say? I do it for love. I also packed a 4-litre box of red wine. That’ll help.
Sleeping through an eye exam, LOL.
You’re so funny
Have a great trip.
Dont forget Patti – there are worse things — like an emergency root canal on Friday morning.
I would take camping any day – but camping with a freshly traumatized molar that is fighting to remain where it belongs – that is another story…
love you – love your blog.